The Challenges of Long-Distance Marriage: A Reflection of the Eternal Promise of Jesus and the Church

It is often said that distance makes the heart grow fonder. After spending my first two years of married life separated by the Pacific Ocean and then some, I feel that this is a rather unique experience that I have learned and strengthened my faith from.

Long-distance marriages symbolize a profound commitment challenged by physical separation, communication barriers, and emotional longing. Through struggling through and overcoming these challenges together with my wife, Farah, I have some reflections I would like to share that draw some similarities to the spiritual journey of Christians awaiting the eternal union with Christ. After all, our relationship as Christians with Jesus is often likened to a marital union (Ephesians 5:22-32).

Challenges of Long-Distance Marriage

1. Physical Absence: The most apparent challenge is the lack of physical presence, which can lead to feelings of loneliness and longing. In our case, our long-distance marriage started barely 2 weeks after our wedding: after I had returned from sending her off for her Masters program in the US. To help with this, we planned to meet in person at least once every few months, and we kept to that plan throughout the 2 years of long distance marriage.

2. Communication Barriers: Distance can cause misunderstandings due to differences in time zones, limited face-to-face interaction, and reliance on technology. Before we started the long-distance marriage, we made a commitment to call each other at least once, if not twice a day. Given the favorable time difference of 13-14 hours, we were able to catch up and share our days with each other daily, which helped us feel present in each other’s lives despite the distance.

3. Emotional Strain: The emotional toll of separation can generate feelings of doubt and insecurity. Throughout the two years, there were definitely tough and vulnerable conversations that were vital to help us get through difficult periods individually and as husband and wife. However, we were also prepared for this and promised each other to push through these difficult conversations and come out of them stronger each time.

   
   

The Long-Term Promise: Jesus and the Church

By now, I hope the recurring theme is evident: What really helped us get through the two years was to make and stick to certain promises. Similarly, God has made a promise of eternal life to us that we know He will fulfill if we do our part (Mark 16:16).

• Unwavering Commitment: Just as couples remain faithful despite physical separation, God remains committed to His promise, even more so than any human could guarantee. His love is constant and unwavering, regardless of circumstances, exemplified through sending Jesus to die for our salvation (John 3:16). How do we do our part to reciprocate God’s unwavering commitment to us?

• Enduring Love and Trust: Trust in God's promises and patience through life's trials echoes the emotional endurance required in a long-distance marriage. If imperfect human beings are capable of keeping promises to each other, how can we expect any less from our Father in Hheaven?

• Hope for Reunification: As Christians, we anticipate the return of Christ, a reunion that will eliminate all separation and bring eternal joy (Philippians 3:20-21). I was overjoyed when Farah finally came home for good and we could finally resume our lives together - I can only imagine what our joy will be like when Jesus comes again!

  
  

Both long-distance marriages and the divine relationship between Jesus and the church illustrate the power of faith, trust, and an unwavering promise in hopes of an eventual reunion. While physical and emotional challenges may test our resilience, I hope for all of us that the promise of future reunion in Heaven keeps our spirits strong.