Keeping Calm in a Chaotic World

I recently faced an incident at work that caused me a lot of sleepless nights, difficulty concentrating and loss of appetite. It also affected my ability to think properly and one day I accidentally drove the car to work, leaving my poor husband stranded at home (he was supposed to drive that day for an event)! Thankfully, that work incident has since been resolved, my worries have dissipated, my mood lifted and I’ve not left my husband stranded without a car on the day that he needs it.

Why do we worry? I know I worry because I want to anticipate any potential problems to prepare how to resolve it or respond to it. Perhaps it’s a job hazard where, in my role as a hospital-based physician, we are trained to consider various possible worst-case scenarios and plan the course of action accordingly. It also stems from a desire to be in control. Another reason for worrying include believing that worrying will somehow prevent the dreaded outcome from actually occurring. Some may also feel that worrying about their loved ones is a way of showing care.

Worry has both short-term and long-term effects. In the immediate period, worry can be a motivating factor for some to get things done. However, it may also cause one to feel stressed, anxious and distracted. Chronic stress from worrying may lead to long-term health issues like cardiovascular diseases and depression.

One person in the Bible who had great reasons to worry was Hannah. In 1 Samuel 1, we are told of Hannah’s predicament – she was not able to conceive. To add on to her troubles, her husband’s other wife Peninnah, who was able to have children, often provoked her and caused her great misery. Hannah could very well have been worried about many things – why she could not conceive, whether her husband would eventually stop loving her due to her barrenness, and what would happen to her when her husband died since she did not have any children to care for her. She was afflicted so severely that her mood and appetite were affected. Hannah then went to the temple and poured out her heart to God in prayer. Remarkably, Hannah was reassured by Eli that God would grant her petition, and she goes away, no longer bogged down by her situation. Although her problems are still there, she is able to eat and no longer feels sad. Interestingly, Hannah does not conceive miraculously nor instantaneously, but “in the process of time” – which suggests some time had to pass before she actually conceived. Yet, between the time of her earnest prayer and conceiving a child, we do not hear of Hannah continuing to be morose or worried, fretting about whether or when God would grant her desire for a child.

How can we keep calm when our situation is full of chaos and stress?

1. Seek God First

Just like Hannah, we need to seek God first and lay before Him our worries and cares, remembering that He cares for us (1 Peter 5:7). In Matthew 6:31-33, Jesus reminds us that, not only does God know what we need, He will also provide. Instead of narrowing our focus on our worries, we ought to remember and trust in God. We also need to remember that, not only is God in control, He is also able to do above and beyond what we can ask or think (Ephesians 3:20). In our prayers, we can also pray for wisdom (James 1:5), peace (2 Thessalonians 3:16) and strength (Philippians 4:13). We must also put aside our embarrassment or fear and ask for others to pray for us! The powerful effect of prayer cannot be underestimated (James 5:15-18). To know that others are thinking of me and helping me to bring my petitions before God is a source of comfort and encouragement.

One thing that helps me to stop descending into a spiral of worry is to also have a heart of acceptance and trust in God’s Will, remembering that whatever happens is according to His purpose (Romans 8:28). I may not get the outcome that I desire, but so long as I trust and obey God – it can still turn out for good. One of my favourite quotes from Ralph Waldo Emerson supports this – “Bad times have a scientific value. These are occasions a good learner would not miss.” In bad situations, we can grow in our character and in our faith.

2.  Stay in the Present

Practicing mindfulness also can help keep worry at bay. When I was feeling anxious about work, I would pause and pay attention to the tension and stress that my body was feeling, and name the emotions I was experiencing. This helped me to stay focused on the present and re-direct my thoughts to prevent them from circling around. Journalling, and talking to my husband and trusted friends about my worries also helped me to organize my thoughts and gain some clarity and perspective on my problems. Often, we tend to be quite harsh on ourselves and may have a lot of untrue and critical self-judgment e.g. “I am so careless” or “I am not as capable as others.” The process of talking to others is also healing and stress-relieving, where our negative emotions can be released.

One question that I used to ask myself whenever I begin to worry about something is: “Will this thing matter in 5 years?” If the answer is no, I will decide to limit further time or emotional energy spent to thinking on it. If the answer is yes, I will remind myself to pray about it and submit it into God’s hands. 

Matthew 6:34, in particular, is a good reminder for me. As a mother of young kids, there are lots of things that I find myself thinking/worrying about: am I parenting my kids the right way, are they having microplastics in their food, will Elijah outgrow his eczema, are we speaking enough Mandarin to the boys? And this is just the tip of the iceberg! Jesus reminds us not to worry about the future but to just focus on the present! I have to remember that by worrying about the future, which is something I can neither control nor predict, I am cheating myself and my loved ones of my attention and presence.

3.  Limit unhelpful exposures

Lastly, I found that reducing my consumption of news also helped me reduce my worry. Often, reading online news left me feeling anxious and upset – especially articles related to crimes, wars and disasters (which is what majority of news is all about). In this age of information, it is easy to be overwhelmed. Prior to clicking on an article, we can ask ourselves if it would bring down or uplift our mood, and whether having this information would benefit us positively. Choose to read articles only from reliable sources, not click-bait panic-inducing misinformation. We can also decide to only read the news at a certain times of the day, to avoid burnout from excessive information. The news will always be there and unless we are a news anchor, we have no real need to be on top of the latest news all the time.

Instead of giving in to the temptation to click on an article, we could instead click on our Bible app (or open our physical Bibles) to read a passage, read a Bible-related devotion, watch a video from World Video Bible School or listen to a Bible podcast. God’s Word has the ability to bring great peace to us (Psalm 119:165).

Problems and chaos in this world will never go away, but we can take courage in the reality that we have a loving Almighty Father who cares for us and can give us peace (Philippians 4:6-7).